收心操

我不在家一個半月的結果就是:

1. 家裡好像發生過火山爆發, 到處蒙上一層不知從哪裡來的白灰屑屑, 果爸一臉無辜說, 沒有啊~ 家裡很乾淨啊~ 他都有用吸塵器吸. 看來~女人看的見的, 男人不一定看的見.
2. 果爸雖交代了一下這幾週他如何自理晚餐. 我一聽他含糊的說詞 就猜他大概又是胡亂吃一堆我最唾棄的frozen waffle 或是 frozen dinner之類的.
3. 果果一身毛像雜草, 一臉不滿, 像個野孩子一樣, 至於這隻小壞蛋因分離焦慮而摧毀破壞的家中物件, 更是不計其數.

這時嘮叨無益, 第二天我就捲袖彎腰進行還我河山收復故土的工作, 把“單身漢公寓”復元為“家”的樣子, 也剛好順便藉此動力保持清醒, 跟時差抗衡.

接下來的四十八小時內, 果爸飛印度出差去, 果果則被送到美容院去理毛, 恢復文明狗的模樣, 我們猜想應該是這裡的濕熱, 讓他在kennel boarding時皮膚輕微感染, 於是我請美容師把果果全身毛整個剃短.

沒想到這一剃讓果果全身的贅肉無處躲藏, 當美容院的交通車送果果回來時, 我只見到一隻“小神豬”很“實在”地從車裡彈跳滾出. 我定眼一愣, 勉強鎮定, 試圖將眼前景像歸咎于是我回德州感染百度高溫暑熱的海市蜃樓後遺症, 沒想到耳邊飄來樓下保安一句不必要的關心話 - 喲~~ 你家狗怎麼這麼胖? - 成了壓垮我的最後一根稻草, “我是個失敗的媽媽嗎??” 羅馬不是一天造成的, 眼前這隻小神豬絕不是一天或一週吃出來的, 趕緊email果爸報告果果變神豬的懸疑案, 果爸這時才提供線索, 原來他忙得不可開交, 過去這幾週, 實在沒甚麼時間帶果果好好運動, 我這才鬆了口氣, 擺脫一些罪惡感. 看來我平常在家對他們父子倆福祉的的貢獻還是挺大的, 嘿嘿~ 家庭主婦一定要有這樣自我吹捧的自信, 日子才過得更有勁! 言歸正傳, 小神豬得要瘦身才行, 還好天氣沒那麼熱了, 這項差事應不致太苦!

接著, 我又祭出刷刷牙的新規矩. 主要是因為這次回去看到費絲姊妹家的小犬每早都乖乖的讓媽媽刷牙, 而想想我和果爸想這麼做, 想了五年都遲遲沒有行動, 刺激之下, 於是決心冒著被果果咬的危險, 與他的大鋼牙背水一戰, 沒料想到, 這小子在雞肉口味牙膏的誘惑下, 才掙扎了三秒鐘就投降, 只見他伸脖張嘴忙著吃牙膏, 根本不太在乎有根牙刷在他的黃板鋼牙上游移, 不過果果吃牙膏的速度很快, 讓我也是手忙腳亂的掃射亂刷, 我想熟能生巧, 我的技術應該會慢慢進步的, 一刷完, 我馬上email果爸報告這項奇蹟. 人算不如天算, 居然如此不費吹灰之力就成功, 我們怎麼想了五年都沒行動咧? 我們生活中還有多少像這樣“想太多”的遲疑呢?

目睹果果思母心切所爆發出的破壞半徑幅度 - 包括摧毀半人高的盆栽; 吃掉乳液, 唇膏及牙膏; 咬爛我的牙刷及化妝包; 攻擊家裡所有的面紙盒…等等等, 分析下來, 多數破壞應純屬非計畫性的情緒焦慮洩恨, 我了解到有媽媽在, 對他的情緒平衡與快樂與否的影響是這麼重要, 他無法言語, 只能以行動表達他的失落, 可憐的小壞蛋~ 不過針對摧毀面紙盒一事, 我和果爸有理由懷疑那是果果有計劃性的找碴, 因為那天, 雖然他有機會, 他卻甚麼也沒動 - 不但一個垃圾桶也沒翻, 連他經常會由狗籠裡拖出來甩舞龍舞獅秀的臭被被都好好的留在在原地 - 然而, 詭異的是…..家裡每個房廳裡放的所有面紙盒都被他一個個地追蹤鎖定, 並加以搗毀, 手段智慧冷靜, 且擺明了是他故意的! 這隻小壞蛋, 雖然可憐, 但更可惡!

不過老實說, 這隻毛茸茸的小神豬再如何使壞搗蛋, 即便是咬壞我最愛的包包, 只要他兩眼發亮愛慕地直盯著我, 接著往我身上飛撲亂蹭, 獻上愛的親親, 再把我臉上的乳液, 粉底等都舔個一乾二淨時, 我只會融化臣服在他一臉的天真無辜下.

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回來美國囉~

回到美國兩個多星期了
感覺好棒
自由自主的感覺
能夠和朋友鄰居的相聚敘舊
每天短褲T恤拖鞋輕鬆出門
不會有人把我當成"阿姨"對待
不會看到路上有人吐痰或尿尿
過馬路也不用擔心車不讓你
也不用提防店員冷不防的惡劣態度

日日藍天白雲綠樹清風
呼吸百分百全方位的自由與輕鬆感
啊!真有點不想回上海了
嘻嘻
給果爸知道的話他會很緊張
我也是很想念果果的
雖然這兩星期來天天都是100F的酷熱天
不過這種乾熱比上海的大蒸籠好受的多

忙著在有限時間內把房子內外小小整修一番
每天三顧home improvement stores
買貨搬貨退貨
跟contractors討價還價
忙著在短時間內做各種顏色尺寸樣式的決定
發現remodeling也不是很好玩
新點子與後悔感隨時交錯出現
when reality kicks in, 真的很多時候就隨便它而不再堅持理想跟自己過不去了
感謝有朋友們的協助
不然很多瑣事靠我自已一人是完成不了的
他們的幫忙非常重要
當然更感謝老公辛苦上班賺錢
希望最終展現的成果是值得的

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Toy, toy, more toy....

We never track down how much money we have spent on Squarky's toys in the past years since we brought him home. If we ever did, I believe it would be an unbelievable horrifying number
So I am glad we never track

There is also another number which I am glad we never track
It is the number of the toys that Squarky has terminated, or , more correctly, "digested".
If we ever did, I believe Squarky would have been crowned "K9-Hannibal" and we were supposed to be on the run with him from FBI's hunt down right now.

The number One type of toy that Squarky insanely obsesses with is squeaky stuffed animal.

This picture, which was taken in June year 2003, three months after we brought him home, shows the very first "funeral" I held for the very first group of these "casualties". After that, no funerals could be possibily held as Squarky had advanced to "digest" most of these victims

From then, Squarky's digestive adventure started to take off. Fabric, plastic, rubber.... all have had appeared in his poop. Not that I intend to boost and encourage this. This was something that had happened.

After the surgery ordeal this year, we set out an iron fist to remove toys that don't resist his love bites and set a clear boundry as to what toys he can keep in his toy box to play freely whenever he wants and what toys are kept away and only get to play under our close supervision. We are glad that Squarky seems to content with the new rule .

The toy shown in the center is called "Bad Cuz" made by JW Pet company. Bad Cuz with the fido football on the right are the new additions to Squarky's toy collections. Squarky loves these two toys. The pink tennis-size ball on the left is to contrast the size of Bad Cuz and the fido football. And yes, Bad Cuz and the fido football are both super sized and Squarky likes this way.

JW Pet company does make good fido toys that are fun and tough. So far, their toys remain indestructible from Squarky's point of view.

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